I just wanted to wish everyone a fabulous new year while looking back at the last twelve months.
2023 was for me, pretty crap all in all, the highlights being the wedding of our eldest to the girl of his dreams and the continued support of my family and friends. I often wonder how people not blessed with having such folk in their lives get through those life crises that we all face from time to time.
Like many of my generation and those that are older , I'm having to change with modern life and with modern thoughts, it's not always easy.
It's all too easy to say the wrong thing, or act in a way that 20 years ago would have been seen as funny or considered banter but now , rightly or wrongly gets folk offended or at least gives them the opportunity to be offended.
I found myself with a habit of calling women “love” and have actively had to think my way into not saying it. After all , quite rightly more often than not they are not “my love”. I never meant it to demean anyone or belittle any of the ladies I may have said it to ( it started as a way of addressing some of the elderly ladies I used to visit as part of my job).
But today , at the end of 2023, I have to accept that it can cause offence.
That doesn't make me or us bad people, perhaps we need to be given time to adjust.
You cannot go through life worrying if what you said without malice or in jest and was accepted as such in 1999 is going to be thrown in your face now as an example of your underlying badness..
But we also must not be frightened to be ourselves or to express our views,
Perhaps we all need to be a little more forgiving and a lot more understanding.
The world has changed so much in such a short space of time. We have divisive and partisan views and attitudes in everything from politics to sport, even tv news channels are accused of bias, by people who oppose what they are being told. Who would have thought that it might be necessary to take time off from facebook or other social media for your own mental well being ?
I've had to do it and when you think about it it's madness, social media is supposed to help you reach people.
It will only get worse as we head into a much needed general election. We got a healthy slice of this during last May's local elections . That period and the following months in Council have left me both very angry and bitter for a while.Things were done, things were said and people have behaved in hypocritical and despicable ways but for many reasons I, and those other Cllrs who have witnessed it , cant say anything because it will be us that gets into trouble.
So, I've learnt that the damage being done to the Council and to our districts future, ( and my view is that we are witnessing the demise of the FODDC and that The Forest of Dean's growth and positive change is under huge threat,) is the will of the people who voted for these councillors and the responsibility lies with those councillors who support what's going on for whatever reason and there's nothing I can do about it .
That's democracy and me getting uppity or not sleeping thinking about it isn't going to change a thing.
Locally , in my ward,we are finding ourselves now having to witness the resurrection of the Community Group Fans from its slumber. I cant believe that is the case so much work has been done and so much has been achieved and yet arrogant or ignorant individuals are threatening to damage what we have been striving for , for a decade. I want to try to be charitable and hope they are doing it for the right reasons, but despite that effort, I can't.
My Dad used to tell me that sometimes you have to take your lumps, this year I've felt as if I've had a bit of a kicking all in all. But I'm still here, I still have my family, and for Boxer, I'm getting up off my stool, ready for the next round.
From one job that ended horribly and left me ill with depression , I entered a period of real worry because getting a job locally , after you've been a loud mouthed political leader who has tried to stand up for the district, isn't easy.
Opportunity after opportunity would come from afar, Cornwall to Cumbria, I had job opportunities from people who looked at my work in the council. But locally, I would be interviewed , it would go well, everything seemed positive, then bang ! disappointment or worse nothing at all.
It was a chastening experience let me tell you, I really thought at one point I would have to relocate.
At the time ,I was waiting for an opportunity to come to fruition that was awaiting funding sign off. I'm fortunate now that I have been given that opportunity and a little later in the new year will begin a new exciting chapter, working for people who wanted me, for my skills and saw my experience and history as a positive
It also means I get to stay here , the place where I want to be with my family.
I may have got things wrong, I've made mistakes. I can't just whinge about not being in charge of the Council anymore and I can't believe that the world owes me a living or that the Health Gods owe me a bit of a break.
But I do know such mistakes , if they have been made , have been made honestly and with good intention. I believe my strategy at FODDC and for the Forest of Dean was the right one and that it was paying dividends,
I took too much stuff on my shoulders and worked bloody hard, to the point where I basically got myself , somewhat buggered.
I took too much to heart. I worried about failing you all , I still do .
My skin remains painfully thin.
But I've not only learnt that I'm not Superman , I've also learnt that it's ok to give a wotsit, it's ok to be fallible.
I know that everything I have done in that Council Role has been done with the interests of the Forest and with my ward members best interests at heart. I will continue in that manner.
I also believe that I'm a decent sort of a chap, far from perfect, but decent .
I can change some things, I cannot change others
It has taken me a lot of time and a lot of self examination to get here.
But I can close that chapter now.
I hope 2024 is the most splendid year for all you and your families.
May Health and Happiness be constant companions to you all.
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